Archive for the ‘Memoirs of an Intern’ Category

The End

Posted: August 4, 2011 in Memoirs of an Intern

Hello and welcome!

I’m very sad yet glad that this is the final entry in the memoirs. Yes, you all can be sad now. No? Well whatever.
Before I continue, I just want to say that I really enjoyed myself during this internship. It was fun yet very educative. To be honest, after being here, my mind is now fully made up whether I want to go into advertising. The answer to that is NO! I really want to be a writer. More like a fashion magazine writer kind of thing. I’ve already started my journey with my internship with Bella Naija. Two articles written by yours truly has been published. Check it out!
On to the main point of this post
I worked with account management. These are the big boys and girls of the agency. They earn more money than everyone else in the agency. All the women in this agency wear Loubotin shoes with Mongolian hair and have perfect faces.
So imagine me with my Lagos market heels, 1k weave and not so perfect face.
It was quite the opposite if what I imagined actually.
They were all nice to me and helped me if I had any problems with tasks they gave me. They gave me tips on how to control my natural hair (I mentioned it to one of them who told me that she too has natural hair and that her weave is ‘just Peruvian’). They made jokes with me, smiled with me. And here am thinking that they would be so bitchy towards me.
There was a day one of the girls there was shouting on the phone. If you saw my tweets that day, you would know. Apparently, she’s an actress turned advertising guru. Out of respect of her privacy, I won’t say her name. That day was so entertaining for me. She was shouting and screaming on the phone about how one journalist was set out to ruin her career and life and how someone stole her Jimmy Choo shoes. After all her ranting and shouting, she started calling and begging her ‘boyfriend’ for money. And she was going to Abuja that day.
Maga don pay ….
Apart from that, nothing else happened. Account management was cool and nice. Did some work, learnt how to do stuff and all.
On to the next ….
Two days in administration. I thought that would involve me sitting in an office and helping with photocopies.
Big mistake.
I was made the acting receptionist. Yes, I was practically the face of the company. My job included meeting guests, collecting letters and calling people to come pick up letters and such. When Tope (the intern who was there before) told me this, I thought I was going to have a swell time.
Another big mistake.

Monday, I did not sit down. The intercom was spoilt so I had to go around looking for everyone that had visitors. That day was now the day everyone had a meeting with someone. At the same time, I was writing two articles for Bella Naija at the same time. As I was receiving emails from the editor and searching for information, I was walking up and down the office and talking to people and signing and collecting letters.
Once I got home, I was out for about 5 hours straight.
Tuesday was much better but still filled with stress. Visitors came around but not so much. Not many letters came in too. It was def a much better day.

So let me talk about my ‘send off’.

Everyone sincerely looked like they would miss me. I will miss them but the way they acted ehn, as if I was taking a trip to the underworld. All the creative guys hugged me like 20 times. Yemi just called me over and hugged my for about 2 mins straight. I felt so loved and cared for. Sniff.
Tobi however looked like Christmas came early. Just said ‘goodbye’ and walked off. To make my day better, she tripped and we laughed at her. What? Allow me to laugh jor!
Collected my clearance letter and said one last good bye to everyone and left.
Oh, Godwin/Godsgrace asked for my pin again. I wanted to do what ThinkTank said but I dint have any pin to act sexy with. I just laughed again and walked off shaking my nice ass in his face.

So ya, that’s it! No more waking up by 6am or dealing with evil witches. I am done with CentreSpread and I’m very sure I’m going to get a good grade at school for all the work I did here.

Now that this is done, I will focus on my other projects and my 30 day challenge. I posted yesterday but no1 read it 😦 . Go check it out as well as Day 4 (today).
Thank you all for staying with me and reading my memoirs. I really appreciate it. I hope I didn’t bore you guys sha! Thanks again.


The Two Tales

Posted: July 27, 2011 in Memoirs of an Intern


Welcome to my third post in my memoir series. Sorry this is late, I was busy yesterday. Thank you for sticking with me and reading all my adventures! I really appreciate it all!
So let me just get to the point.
Nothing really special happened this week.
But …!
I will tell you all two stories of what happened at work.
One is about the wicked witch of the office.
Her name is Tobi.
You all will remember how I was pissed off and annoyed with her as she had assumed I wanted to sleep with fine but about to be married guy right?
Well, she works in the department I was transferred to.
Strategy is the most annoying department I ever worked in! Its all about research and developing tactics to advertise a brand.
Tobi realized that I practically had nothing to do for them. For the first two days all I did I collected newspapers and make photocopies.
On the third day, I never sat down.
‘Deola, go get me this paper in the DMD’s office’
‘Deola, I need some water’
‘Deola, tell the caters to save my food and lay it on the table’
‘Get me some coffee.’
‘Deola, get my shoes from the shoe maker outside’
‘Go online and send this email for me’
I became a house girl for her. She even started relegating her regular jobs to me.
Now I couldn’t complain because I’m an intern and I have to do the jobs she gives me but when I spoke to the other interns about it, they said that there work was a breeze and they weren’t being sent up and down. I really started disliking Tobi and whenever Yemi came around, I hugged him very well in front of her. Showing her that whatever she sends me to do, e no pain me!!!

Now on the next, on on to the next …
There was this guy called Godwin or Godgrace or something I sha know that God is there ..
He’s been nice and friendly and you know …
Then one day I mention that I’m only here for two more weeks and he goes ‘Gimmie ur pin so we can hook up later’
Ehn ….
I said no and he got offended instantly. He automatically assumed that something was gonna go on between us. Also, he went to ‘report’ me to a co-worker. He had the balls to speak yoruba and say stuff like ‘why is she fronting?’ and ‘its just a pin’
I love when people assume cos I act posh I don’t understand yoruba. BIG MISTAKE!
So I went to the co-worker and explained that he already assumed so much from me and also I’m really not interested in men right now. He went off to Godwin/Godgrace and made me sound like an indecisive babe.
See why men annoy me so much?
When I heard that, I went to Godwin/Godgrace and set the record straight with him. The next day at work, the boy didn’t answer me when I said good morning!
Good riddance!

Sha, that’s mostly what happened this week. Next week I shall be working in the highest department; account management. This were all the Mongolian hair and loubition (I wish I knew how to spell this word I swer) women reside. Its my last official week in the office!!!

Oh ya, today is my dad’s birthday!!!! Happy birthday to my daddy dearest!!! Plenty love for him!!!

The Creative Gang

Posted: July 18, 2011 in Memoirs of an Intern

Sorry this wasn’t posted on Friday, I was down with food poisoning and malaria at the same time. I didn’t go to work for two days.
So Thursday I started working in the creative department. Before I continue, I would like to show you some pictures! 🙂

Me on my first day at work

The wall of the creative studio before we delt with it

A better view of the wall

When we dealt with the wall. You can see 'Dee' in the corner

I had to leave my name

The wall of the studio I was transfered to

They watch us

The Creative director, Kenny

See! This place is awesome!!!
Sha, I pulled up a seat next to Yemi and started working. We were working on a campaign and I was giving different ideas. He said my ideas where awesome ^_^
That’s when Tobi came in. I think this girl doesn’t like me. Every time I’m with Yemi or any of the guys, she gives me a dirty eye and starts saying stuff like:
‘You and boys sha’
‘Na wa o, where is your office sef?’

I really feel like beating her up but I’m just here for a month. I don’t want to cause any wahala for myself. I just laugh and face what I’m doing.
So she came in and started talking to Yemi about a wedding photographer. I didn’t want to but in and eavesdrop but I heard three words
‘How is your wife sef?’
Well, its 5 words but I was traumatized so I didn’t even care.
He has a fiancée.
My geek adonis has a fiancée.                                                                                                                                                                                                                  Once I heard this, I laughed so hard in my mind. All the girls that were sending me DMs shld hear now! HE IS GETTING MARRIED!!!
To make my day better, the creative director moved me to another studio. There was already an intern working there so they wanted to spread us out.
The other studio was okay tho. It has this upstairs place called ‘the deck’ where people can sleep if they are tired. It was like heaven to me.
I stayed in the new studio but got bored and went to visit the other one I was there helping them with their projects and I went home after.
Friday was annoying. I stayed in my studio until I went to see the other interns for lunch. I forgot my wallet so I went back to my studio. Yemi was there and was working with someone. As soon as I left the studio, he followed and was also heading to lunch. We entered the canteen together and Tobi’s eyes were on me.
I actually sat on a different table altogether to avoid Tobi and Yemi.
But noooooooooooo, she just HAD to talk.
As he left he came to meet me and said
‘See you later’
Tobi just had comment and just had to comment
‘Be careful oh, he’s married and he’s just looking for a way to get it all out of his system’
What is my business with this? Me I was minding my own business and he came to meet me! Why does this girl think I want to sleep with him? I wanted to comment but I just kept it to myself. .
Monday was boring actually. Went to work, worked on a few projects and I avoided the other studio altogether. I saw Yemi and gave him some suggestions about the project but I limited it to just that.
Tuesday was just fantastic. *rme*
As usual I didn’t go near the other studio. It was time for lunch but the caters where not around. I went to the studio to see if they knew what was up about the food. One thing lead to another, and I ended up going to a buka with the guys. When I got home afterwards, the vomiting and toilet visiting started. Maybe that’s where I got the food poising from. *shrug*
No work on Wednesday and Thursday for me because I was in the hospital and resting. I never expected it but they all called me to say get well soon !!! I felt so loved!!!
Did I mention Yemi was a rapper? Well, he and Steez (co worker) rapped for me. 🙂
Friday I was back to work and all. Nothing happened really. Just hanging with people and eating cake. Yes I broke my diet.
Friday was my last day in creative and I was meant to have a project but because I was sick, they allowed me to move on to strategy.
Sorry this kind of like the dullest post. All I actually do in the office is gist, use free internet and sleep.
Next week will be about my time with the strategy people. Tobi works in this department. What fun and joy.

So ya, this was meant to be posted on Friday but as i said before I was sick. My new post will be about my time with strategy. I hope not to kill Tobi.

I’m applying for three writing which will already add more with the two jobs I have. So ehn, please pray for me. I need exposure as this is what I want to do. As in, earn money. So now you get it. If you also know someone who is looking for a writer/blogger, please let them know about me. I can write about anything from fashion to music and even a bit about relationships and such. I’m not even gonna charge much (wait, you think I’ll write for free?) Sha, just let them know I’m here.

Thank you all as usual. 🙂


In the beginning

Posted: July 8, 2011 in Memoirs of an Intern

Hello everyone! Welcome to my first entry of my memoirs. What you are about to read is me trying to be funny and entertaining. If I don’t pull it off, please don’t insult me or don’t make me feel bad. Just note in the comments section that I’m not funny and I will never try it again.

As all of you maybe know or not know, I’m a student at the American University of Nigeria. I’m a senior now (4th level or level 4 as you people call it) and it is requirement before I am allowed to graduate, I have work as an intern (IT or industrial attachment as you people call it again). As a journalism and advertising student, I needed a media job.
This was not an easy task. When it comes to magazines, they believe that you are a waste of space and time. I’m not exactly a fashion writer but I was ready to try my hand and see if I could learn a new skill and stuff. I tried applying for a space at two magazines which I shall not name and they turned me down. I really did not want to work for an ad agency since I wanted to get a master’s degree in journalism but there was nothing I could do. My dad made a few calls and I got a personal letter to be given to the head of CentreSpread FCB.
So after 2 weeks of being pushed around by the company, I was told to resume work on the 1st of July. I was going to work for four weeks to complete 189 hours. I just needed 120 but having more hours was considered a bonus and a good way to get away from home.
I got to work on Friday and met the human resources woman. She gave me my schedule and went over some very boring stuff with me. I swear as she was talking I started imagining tigers eating her blouse. It was a very ugly shade of orange and it almost made me cry looking at it.
After going through that torture, I was given a tour of the company. The company is big sha. As in, I’m happy I wore flats or else my feet would have had blisters. The company is divided into five main parts, media planning and strategy, account management, administration, finance and the creative studios. The creative studios are AWESOME! They have drawing and colorful paintings on the walls. I will be able to post pics of it when I start working there as part of the internship.
Now I’m working for four days in media planning. Media planning deals with doing research and knowing which media will be used to advertise and reach the audience. Involves dong serious research (Which I learnt how to do in a class where I faked research and wrote an entire paper complete with charts and graphs in one night!)Media Strategy actually shares the same room with planning so I’m still going to come back and work in the same office.
Friday involved me meeting people and letting them know who I am. I met some ‘okay’ guys no cute ones.
Monday was very different.
Got to work as usual and started jisting and talking to people.
Nothing different or out of the way. Did photocopies for the HOD. Sorted out media payments and receipts.
Lunch came and I, Tobi and Segun went to the cafeteria to eat. The cafeteria was serving colored rice and turkey. As I was waiting in line, we started shouting about food and how hungry we were. I was laughing my ridiculously loud laugh which was not a good thing.
A little info about my loud laugh.
When I laugh, I sound like a normal child.
When I laugh loudly, l laugh like a witch that having an asthma attack (I’ve been told this by five different people)
So imagine my ridiculously loud laugh.
As soon as we turned around after getting our food, I met him.
Readers, I met the finest guy I have ever seen in the history of the world.
Half-Caste, light brown eyes. Braided hair.
Let me not forget how tall he is and how built he was.
A Greek Adonis.
And he was waiting in line right behind me!
And he heard my ridiculously loud laugh!
To save face and seem dignified, I laughed a little laugh and moved as fast as my legs could carry me.
I’m very sure he thinks the new intern is a retard.
Lemme make this clear, I’m not looking for an office romance or anything. I’ve decided to keep away from men or anything like p setting or relationships for the next one year. But think about it like this; how would it feel if you knew the finest guy/girl in your office thinks you are a retard?
Now you get the point.
Sha sha, I got over it and went to eat and continue living my life.
Tuesday was …. Interesting.
So I came to work later because a trailer blocked the whole road. As bad guys, boys were running to go and steal what was in the trailer – wheat. Grown ass Nigerian men were running and stealing buckets to get heaps of wheat. I give up on this country.
As I was in the office, Damilola from account management came in. If I ever wanted to pursue a career in advertising, I would want to be in account management. It’s like marketing in banking. You make sure everything goes well one it comes to advertising their product. It pays really well but it’s kind of stressful.
I helped her look for Etisalat adverts in newspapers so that they could show Etisalat what they have done and ideas they have brought up. I felt really good after that because all I have been doing here is getting photocopies and using free internet.
Lunch came but Segun and Tobi went out. I went to lunch alone and saw the creative gang. If you have ever been around a bunch of creative mad people, you should forget that. These people will give you a new meaning to madness and creativity. I saw fine half caste boy and found out his name – Yemi
Funny that the name of my shitty arrogant ex is Yemi.
Those people are CRAZY! I had to try not to choke on my lunch of spaghetti. They tried to mix me up and tell me different names but I already knew half of their names. Then all of a sudden all the men started taking pictures of me. I was flattered but extremely shy. The other intern at the table was just smiling and keeping quiet. Oh did I mention I sat down next to my male Adonis? Yes I did.
As I wanted to leave, Emmanuel (one cute guy), was asking me to stay and not go back to the office. Instantly, they started teasing him and saying that he had already fallen in love with me without giving the other guys a chance. I just moved away and went back to work.
Wednesday was my last day in media planning so they gave me a little project to work on. I had to come up with a media mix and plan for a fake drink. Before I could do that, I was called to the human resources department to distribute and give out detergent. As an advertising company, we get free gifts from companies we advertise. It’s a way of saying thank you to us. I didn’t mind I was getting free detergent but I had to go around and give it to everyone in the office, including the creative team.
They laughed at me ehn. Yemi was just looking at me with my hand covered with white soap and such. So much for saving face in front of the fine guy.
After that everything was normal. Didn’t go for lunch cos I was working on my media plan. In the end I did a good job and was allowed to move to creative. I was gonna be working with Yemi and the gang.

That’s it for now. The next memoirs will be talking about how i worked with the creative team. I think that’s going to be interesting.
PS – I wanted to put pictures but I don’t know how to insert them with my blackberry. Can some1 help me pls? 🙂